One Year Ago...

Brad and I were anticipation of THE MOST important phone call of our lives.  After receiving the call, we took this picture to announce to my family that I was pregnant!

The text read, "next stop...Destination MATERNITY!"

After taking the picture, Brad and I went to buy something to give the baby.  Our first purchase for OUR baby.  We bought the sweetest little white bunny.

Today, one year later - this precious angel fills our days with smiles and coos.

And, Sadie and bunny are best buddies :)  Bunny has been with her through surgeries, and many rocking and reading sessions with Mommy.  Bunny stayed on my nightstand during my entire pregnancy...she's been on the journey with us!

What an unbelievable year it has been!

I know it is of no surprise what I'm most thankful for this Thanksgiving!  So, so, so thankful for Sadie Hope.  Thank you, sweet girl, for making me a Mama.  I love you!

A New Season

This post has absolutely nothing to do with the beach, but I promised to post some beach pictures, so they're just a bonus to my ramblings today... :)

For the first time in a very long time, I am in a new place in my life.  I have found something I have longed for, prayed for, searched for, and had just about decided my heart was incapable of.

Contentment.  

In this season, in this moment.

Now, most would assume (and I would have years ago) this contentment came when a little 7 lb, 5 oz baby entered my world a few months ago.  It is true - she has brought more joy, more happiness, and more love than I could have ever possibly imagined.  Our little Sadie is no doubt an unmistakable gift from God.    

But I want to be clear - this contentment is not about Sadie.  

This contentment is not about taking a year off from teaching...or, from a having perfectly imperfect marriage.

It's about Jesus.  It's about the heart change I have had.  It's about this season of life that He has brought me to - a season full of mothering, and ministering, and serving, and living in the right now.  It's about what He's doing in me.

Don't mistake this contentment as life is perfect.  Far from it.  My life is messy right now to say the least.  Some days are down right hard.  I still face struggles everyday, and go to bed many nights feeling like I should have accomplished more in the day.  I still face feelings of failure and insecurity.  Life is still too busy and more chaotic than it really should be.  I still mess up and have to ask for forgiveness daily.  

But, my heart is full.  And, I know, that I know, that I know, for this moment in time - I'm right where I need to be, doing exactly what I've been called to do.  Be a wife, be a mother, serve in ministry, and daily live in the moment - accepting the grace I've been so graciously given.  You see, I've spent way too many days and years just making it through.  Just surviving.  Loving the Lord always; but, never resting in Him enough to be content with where He had me.  Always looking and searching for the next season instead of enjoying the joy of the every day.  

The Lord has allowed me to break those chains I've been in for so long, and just breathe.  And rest in Him.  To enjoy this place, this time. Oh what peace contentment brings.

And friends, it feels good.

While this contentment is not hinged on having had Sadie, or my current employment status, or my marriage - having contentment with ME and my life allows me to find even greater joy in those things.  

So, I felt compelled to share this new season of contentment for 2 reasons.  The first, to celebrate...WHOOP, WHOOP!! :) Second, I want to encourage you if you just read this and feel bewildered or frustrated, because you are in a place of complete dis-contentment.  If you're worn out and tired.  Searching and trying to desperately reach a place of peace in your life, a place of contentment...hold on, friend.  Keep your head up high, and keep your eyes fixed on Him.  

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer...let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:6-7)   

 

Sadie is 3 Months Old!

I can't believe Miss Sadie Hope has already turned 3 months old.  I know I'm behind on posting this, but I did take her picture on her 3 month birthday...

What is Sadie up to these days?

• She weighs 11 lb 11 oz, and is 24 inches long.  
• She is in size 1 diapers.
• She wears 0-3 months and a few (smaller) 3-6 months clothes...I had to start putting up some of her clothes, mainly because of the season change more than her growing out of her clothes.  It was hard putting away some of those sweet outfits knowing she would never wear them again!  Each outfit had a memory attached to it...I can't believe how fast time is flying!!! 
• Her eye color is still up for debate - we're holding out for them to stay blue, but some days they look brown or green.
• Her hair is getting very thick, and is looking more light brown every day.
• She eats 4 ounces or nurses 15-20 minutes every 3-4 hours during the day.
• She is a great sleeper...she has her last feeding between 10:00-11:00 pm, and usually wakes up between 5:00-6:00 am.  
• She really has the sweetest personality...she typically doesn't cry unless she's super hungry or needs a diaper change.  She's a very laid back, happy baby!  I don't know how Brad and I got so lucky! :)
• She continues to smile and coo more and more, and is a little mover - she loves laying in her bed or her activity mat and kicking and "talking".  I just love to hear her - sweetest sounds ever!

Some of the most significant events this month were...

Sadie had to have her first esophageal dilation.  Part of TEF is narrowing of the esophagus, and from time to time she will have to have her esophagus stretched.  This was her 2nd surgery in her short little life; however, this was no where near as invasive as the first.  Thankfully, she did great and there were no complications!

 Sadie took her first road trip...to the beach!!  It was such a fun trip (more pics to come in another post!)

This has by far been the fastest, most wonderful 3 months of my life to date...I can't even imagine what is yet to come!!!  I'm so so so humbled to be this sweet angel's Mama!!

Happy 3 months, Sadie girl!!